Everything I learned about Government, I learned from children

Editorial by Laura Hart

When I was younger I took care of a child from drug addicted parents, one who had been sitting in a trailer for seven years inhaling cigarette and probably crack smoke. He had been abused and neglected, and though he lived 15 minutes from the beach, at seven years old he had not even seen it.

While his parents battled their drug problems I tried to find a way to help this boy, untwist his mind, and provide some life tools, honesty and security.

But he did have problems and we had to work on them one by one.

First, like most children who don't want to take responsibility for their actions he had a tendency to lie.

I told him right from the start that if he told me the truth I would be more likely to be lenient but with a long lecture about why he did what he did.

Then there was the warning that if he did lie, I would make sure it was so uncomfortable that he would not do it again. "Why make this worse?" I would ask him.

What he didn't realize was that I was a walking lie detector and after a few months he gave up trying to save himself from being grounded by lying to me. I remember being on the computer and sending him in for a much needed shower.

I heard the water, saw the steam, but he came out in his towel and began talking about how hot the shower was and how much better he felt. I didn't even turn around: "go take a shower and quit faking it."

He argued with me that he had, but his dirty legs told the tale.

I was also very tough on him about his homework and taught him how to get through it quickly, but he was a normal kid and tried everything, including telling his teacher he had no desk or a place to study, and then telling me how "stupid" he was and couldn't understand it.

He was a straight A student.

But he put off doing chores and his responsibilities until the last moment, causing many disasters in the process

One day he came home with his third grade assignment to build a totem pole and tell a story. I said, let's do it and get it done. He said, obviously good at math, "I have 31 days."

I knew what was coming. I told him if you wait until day 30 you will be on your own and the grade you get is what you get.

Each day he told me how many days he had left. I didn't interrupt his life lesson and what I predicted happened. The night before the project was due he went crazy, crying, asking for help with his stories and throwing things.

I was completely unsympathetic, much like I am now with our hospital as I told them not 30 days ago, but a year and a half ago, that they must act now or suffer the consequences. Well, much like my stubborn third grader, now they are begging for help.

I did not complete his project, but gave him advice on how to do it himself. He didn't like his grade and I explained how we could have avoided the whole situation.

He was smart and it never happened again.

The next lesson was the ice cream man. These trucks used to run through the neighborhoods, music coming from the top of the van, so kids were alerted to beg for money and run for the truck.

One day, let's call him "Jacob" came back from the ice cream man with his friends and the ice cream man had overcharged them all. Basically they stole from kids who didn't know their money or their math.

A few weeks later the ice cream man attempted the same thing, but I had set up a plan to catch him. The kids had so much money and I had them order certain things and knew the price. Jacob returned with his change which was not correct.

I made a visit to the ice cream man one day and brought all the kids. I explained as loudly as possible that only the lowest pick on kids who don't know money or math. We were then carrying away arm fulls of ice cream.

So, the new lesson was: know your money. From that point on Jacob and I would grocery shop, I would add it all up in my head and hand him more money than necessary and leave the store and wait in the car while he checked out.

He had to account for every penny. And he was never ripped off again. He got good at it too, and would use his knowledge as he was a good hearted kid, to teach the younger ones about money.

Because in his early years he was so isolated he developed many fears, including learning how to swim. One summer I took on the task of teaching several kids including Jacob to swim in my friend's pool.

They started out in the shallow end and quickly were swimming across the pool. A month later they all had the skills to swim, but Jacob would not go into the deep end.

He hadn't developed enough trust in himself or me.

I created a lesson where the kids would one by one jump off the diving board in the deep end and I would grab a hold and swim them to the side of the pool. All the kids enjoyed it except Jacob.

He needed me to get closer to the diving board as he was afraid he would drown. I told him I would not let anything happen to him and even though he witnessed the other kids successfully living through our lesson, he still didn't have trust.

So, instead of making him do what the others did, I gave in and moved close to the diving board just to get him to go in.

Well, his fears almost occurred as he jumped on my head and knocked me out cold. I woke up under water and grabbed him and swam to the side.

I said, you almost got what you feared the most. I then told him to get out of the pool until he would come into the deep end. He cried and complained, but knew that I meant what I said.

For three days he sat and watched us all have a good time but he clung to his fears deciding the safest thing to do was to suffer on the sideline.

No, fear is not a place to live or at least live happily, so I knew I had to do something drastic.

I pulled out a raft and began diving on it and riding it to the end of the pool. That got his attention. I said, "no not until you get over your fear." In protest he went and sat down.

We played for a while, then I asked him to help and put the raft in front of the diving board for me. When he leaned down to do it, I kicked him in the deep end of the pool. He came up out of the water with a look of horror, then a sudden smile appeared.

He swam and had fun for the rest of the summer.

I learned to mean what I say as children are always testing and to pass along vital life tools so he could become independent. Showed him how to handle his finances (allowance). And the most important lesson was to face your fears and get it over with so you can expand rather than contract.

Then was the manipulation using promises

"I promise I'll clean the dishes if you just let me go out with my friends and I'll be back and do it then," I remember that line well.

Promises, promises, promises, but usually the type that he would get out of doing something like cleaning his room "later" or the type where he will "never" do that again.

I wanted him to say what he meant and do what he meant so I could trust him. I emphasized not making promises he didn't intend to keep. But also knowing what promises he should and could keep.

Keeping children in line like that is tough when they hear adults complaining about politicians who want something: to be elected or raise money or favors for their lobbyists.

So, politicians who go around judging "rap music" and "video games" "sports figures who use steroids" "musicians" and such, forget that they too are role models and from what I've seen in the last decade, and experienced personally in the last five years covering this hospital, I would not want any child to be exposed to such characterless, shameless, arrogance, as we see in the people who promise to represent us.

Relating to KVHD: They compounded their mistakes with interest; they have used the financials to keep us all in the dark (I want an armful of ice cream); they waited until the last minute to take care of their responsibilities and now want us to do their homework for them and bail them out of their mistakes.

The final lesson is the fear and trust issues. Because the hospital has adamantly denied it's responsibility for hiring an unqualified CEO; it's short staffing problems; it's benefits for those who are only at the top; put a GOB on the ballot in 2006 which was fraudulent; defended those who caused the problems and fired those who criticized or disagreed, they have now created a reputation of being untrustworthy.

And they lost an excellent opportunity to learn from their mistakes and the mistakes of their predecessors.

The fear, whoever, it's not just the hospital, it's the people in this valley who complain but never confront which leads to change. They don't want to lose their contracts with the hospital, so they don't speak up, they serve themselves.

I've been in this healthcare district brawl for almost five years now and it has changed me in every way. I wouldn't take a word or a minute of it back. Yes, I made mistakes, but I made sure to learn and try not to repeat my mistakes.

Someone at the last meeting said, I'm not interested in the history of the hospital it doesn't mean anything. I simply replied if you don't learn from history it's bound to repeat itself. She smirked and walked off.

Now here we are with no history lesson, looking for the same amount of money which encumbered the hospital and the community financially 25 years ago: 22,000,000. But hey, this time the community will pay not just in short services, but in cash.

By the way, the woman who said this to me regarding the hospital history, I happened to find some history about her and now understand why she doesn't want to talk about the past...

Jacob is now in the military and he is fighting for this country over in Afghanistan. I think of him everyday worried that a sweet kid is now in the middle of a battle he probably knows nothing regarding the history or the reason for this altercation.

He is risking life and limb for what?

People in this valley who won't even attend a hospital board meeting as they are too afraid to swim in the deep end.

Government officials who are unwilling to do their jobs or keep their promises?

CEO's of corporations who need their financial ventures protected, such as Haliburton in Iraq. People made millions of tax free dollars in Iraq, and Jacob will hopefully just come home. He may make it and be able to get a GI bill if he's not hurt or killed.

But like most, he trusted the government, the recruiter. I will never forget that phone call: "tell me you didn't sign anything." They had him sold and signed before I could even act.

My brother watches too much news and he has made claims he wants to help with the gulf oil spill and help others who are suffering in this country.

My response to him is the same to everyone: clean up your own backyard first.

You can even borrow my rake...