The filtration media used on this blog...yes, we're all bias, and so are you reader. What?

The stories we read and hear in the media are mostly remote and distant from the actual events being reported on.

(I've yet to be invited to the White House, but I still care what is going on there. And, who knows, maybe someday they'll have me over for a chat. Hey, my life has been such that just about anything can happen.)

I think I've made that point heavily on this blog, but there is more to say, as I've transformed myself from an average reporter to someone with a whole new journalistic style: I like to call it "facts and smacks."

But this blog is alive, there's a writer, a person, a whole lifetime of experience which the stories I write have to go through in the filtration process.

You may never know or ever see the reporter from the LA Times who sits behind his name and title, writing from a perspective not that all of us will understand nor care about.

Even our brethren newspaper in Bakersfield is a mystery as to who is writing, why they are writing it, and why they write the story from the angle they do.

I don't know them, their lives, their marketing strategy, but I glean what I can from the paper, with a certain respect that they are doing the best they can to give us a look at what they think is important to write about and print.

The TV stations do blurbs about us in the mountains above Bakersfield, usually with mangled wrecks from the canyon on the five O'clock news, or just video of our elder abuse defendants from the Kern Valley Healthcare District.

(making a point about how this story could even be properly covered by a TV or radio station, even a newspaper would be overwhelmed with this Kern Valley Healthcare District drama. That's why there are now almost 200 blog posts up)

TV does not have time to get anymore than a video bite and a few quotes and lines for the story. They do have the advantage of having the ability to get breaking news to many people in short order, which is important in case of emergencies, fires, road closures, earthquakes, major governmental decisions, untimely deaths, etc.

So, they have their role to play, but more often than not, they try to squeeze a complicated story into a two minutes of air time, and it can become the source of misinformation by virtue of the inability to bring enough of the picture together to make a whole portrait.

The job is tough one, but we are all bias, and all confined by some limitation, whether it be our own personal values, or the media outlet we work for.

I'm so happy to be away from the constraints of the media market, as this blog runs off air and handouts, I have successfully found the freedom to write what I deem important and interesting. And how I write it is no longer going through an editor. (Love you editors, you catch our mistakes before they're published, and then you load us with stories we can't possibly complete, but reporter types are definitely gluttens for punishment.)

There is one thing though, that makes this different, is that I take full responsibility for what is put on this blog. If I make the mistakes it doesn't fall on my editor or corporation it hits me right in the face. But I recognize my responsibility to my readers and actually like it. When I make mistakes, I will be the first to tell you. So, it's a freedom/responsibility combination that makes this endeavor so appealing to me.

You're biased too: don't you realize?

How seriously you take the stories are based on your own filters which means maybe if your healthy and have never been sick in your life, you probably won't open the paper or this blog, to find out all you can about about healthcare issues or reform.

However, your parents are in a nursing home, you turn right to any article that concerns elder abuse or anything to do with diseases of age.

Then there are those interested in crime and punishment, because...they may just like CSI Miami, or have an interest in the inhumanity glaring at them constantly from our media.

I'm not sure why, but I watched the OJ case for months, felt like I knew those people by the time it was over. I even went to the crime scene on Bundy and came up with my own theory. (I still have the pictures somewhere)

I also took off work to watch the Iran/Contra hearings, because it was intriguing to me that our President, Ronald Reagan, was allowing others below him to take the fall (Ollie never fell though) or responsibility for the decisions of our ultimate leader.

My favorite thing to watch for when I actually turn on the TV, which is seldom, but I like to see what the news is teasing. You know what I mean, the story they say is coming up, and you wait through the top stories, the weather, sports and finally they tell you about the pit bulls who ate a house full of babies.

Pit bulls are great stories, everyone talks about it. Now they have all these television shows which provoke our fears about animals: "When animals attack," "When animals hate the postman," "When bears eat your honey," etc.

So, we are being used by the media as they have discovered we will turn on the news if they can scare us half to death.

Not that journalism was ever perfect, it cannot be. Again, its an interpretation being reinterpretted.

What this filter is made of: my bias

If you wonder why I'm doing what I'm doing, you're not alone, I wonder every night, but there are always good reasons and the real reason.

First, I'm an idealist who will fight for principles and values I hold true. I've been in the middle of many wars, this isn't my first tour.

The Casmalia toxic waste issue almost got me thrown out on my ass by secret service.

I've been in the middle of a teacher's strike. Unions versus school board: very inflammatory stuff. Both sides were on the attack, but the school board handled the situation about as badly as could be done. They personally defamed teachers while having an expensive dinner paid for by the district so they could talk about it. (The teachers won, and well they deserved it considering how they were treated.)

Then there was the issue of racism with the farmworkers who lived on the coast and woke up every early morning to pick the food we all shop for at the supermarket. Boy, that was one for the books. The ugliness that came out was something I don't even like remembering.

So, when I write, I can write from all sides, but there is always a stronger version that makes balance almost impossible.

I expect readers to think about what I have written, and not just take an informational handout.

People used to think if there was a cover on a book, or a white coat on a doctor, or a uniform, that it had the credibility and authority.

We all know now that is not true. We have to make sure we filter junk just like our email programs.

So, I'm a Pollyanna, a person of little intelligence, but one of integrity.

Now, let's go on to a more personal perspective. I was damaged by an antibiotic, called Gentamicin, which is an aminoglycoside, and it has all the potential to heal serious infections, but it also has to be handled carefully as it can cause permanent neurological damage.

I was never told about the side effects or what to watch for. So, when the damage occurred I didn't even know there was a relationship between the medicine and my sudden imbalance and blindness.

My life has not been always one of illness, though it is now, it was one of independence and physical strength and prowess.

The dealings I had with doctors were usually concerned with injuries from sports and other physical activities such as climbing and hiking, or my friendly GP was a good friend, we talked regularly.

Then years later I trusted a doctor over my own instincts. That was Oct. 1, 1999, when everything changed because I was not informed about the medication I was on.

You would think that would be enough, as I spent three years working to recover from this life long damage and try to start my life over without all the things I used to love: hiking, climbing, biking, swimming and reading.

I lost all my stress relievers as well as my own self image changed. I felt weak and victimized.

But again, my family and friends, picked me up off the floor and told me to "just keep going."

So, it was building things, climbing ladders, taking care of small children, gardening, reading until it hurt, and I had thought I had overcome the biggest obstacle of my life.

It wasn't the biggest obstacle I would face though

After three years, I had put on more weight and muscle than I had ever carried in my life, and I was ready to get back to it. But I didn't know what it was I was going back to, or more like forward to.

Suddenly, my recovery took a turn, and I was losing all that weight and muscle I had put on. I began to shake all the time and my hair was falling out.

What was I going to do? Not a doctor, hell no. I was scared to death of doctors at that point. But I was as mad as hell at the pharmaceutical industry and their half poison/half cure treatments.

I left my family on the coast as I knew I was sick and I didn't want them to be burdened again with my problems.

What I did was drop my parrot off with my friend, threw some clothes in a bag and took off looking for a den to crawl into. It was completely random, I could have thrown darts into a board, but this is where I ended up.

I headed straight into the mountains and found this isolated valley I had visited when I was young.

I came here to die

The Kern River Valley was my choice of places to die, because by the time I got here, the Grave's disease I was suffering from, had progressed to the point where I was unable to breath well enough to take the trash out and could not sleep at all. My heart pounded in my chest, my hands shook like palsy, while I kept losing weight.

I knew I was very sick, but I couldn't bring myself to go to the doctor. Until my neighbor above the antique store in Kernville, insisted that I go to see someone. Actually threatened to take me to the ER more like it.

Out of desperation I did go to the doctor, over to our Rural Health Clinic, where I would meet with my second destiny: the healthcare fight of my life.

They quickly diagnosed me initially with Grave's disease, but it was all downhill from there.

Unlike the prejudice I have encountered when I became disabled, I had no intention of living my life on medication in front of the television. I like to work and I also believe strongly in service to the community.

So, I have not been playing on the lake or laying around feeling sorry for myself. I've been trying to recover and work.

After some treatment, I began to feel like I could once again be part of the world. I had gained weight, been in an exercise class at the college, and was writing like crazy for the local paper (whom we will be discussing soon). Things were looking up.

However, in October of 2006, as the hospital was covering its dirty dealings in the skilled nursing facility and elsewhere, I again, lost the weight, strength and again was the shell of what I once was.

It all happened on my watch

While I struggled with this current downhill slide, which is still being diagnosed, (should know this week) the hospital administrators knew I was not much of a threat at 90 pounds.

They lied openly and even had these untruths in the newspaper. I didn't know, I was sick, and hanging on for my life. But that's no excuse, I didn't do my job. (If you can't do it right, you shouldn't be doing it. Just heard that somewhere.)

So many people were hurt here while I struggled simply to get out of bed. But I knew the moment, I had the strength, I would flush them out, and do what needed to be done.

Unfortunately, later in that year, out of complete physical weakness, I fell and hit my head, face, on the side of a tub. Ten days later I stroked out which caused more nerve damage; half my face is numb. (not just my skull)

You'd think it would have been over then, I did, but you can't ever count me out, ever.

September 2008: I came back

With my family again taking care of me, I worked to recover from the injuries from the fall, the stroke, then the current illness, which is likely Lupus, and came back to my house in the valley late last year.

No, no help from the rural health clinic, but we're going to take that up next: A Patient's plea: a rural health nightmare.

But now you know how this whole thing started. You know the filter I have. I care about people, principles, and my service to life.

I've been told "you can't take sides you're supposed to be impartial." Whatever, that's so old school. Nobody is impartial.

Let me also say this isn't a personal attack. (Oh, you liar Laura Hart) If it was then I would not be doing this.

For me, it's about progress and change. If nobody "Speak's Up" then the mistakes aren't caught and changed.

I'll give you an example of my bias. The Mt. Mesa Clinical Pharmacy, which is sitting next to Chet Beedle's knife on the cutting board, was my pharmacy for the last five years.

I know the people there and they absolutely HATE ME. I've yelled at them for bad service; called them repeatedly on their mistakes; and generally there's a rift between us. Personally.

However, as a writer, and concerned citizen, I will fight for them to be treated right by this district, keep their jobs, and be paid an adequate wage.

I'm for fairness. If that's a problem, you shouldn't be reading this blog.

(Get ready though, there is going to be some bare knuckle brawling going on soon, as the state of California better be ready to prosecute the situation here at KVHD. Pam Ott is going to court on November third and fourth, and I am going to make sure you know why.)

Bob's bias: just to let you know the radio station of the valley, our only one, as signals get lost out there in the mountain range, had a story about the October board meeting. Yeah, Bob Jamison, KVHD board member, reported his own story from the board. I guess "smooth news" was busy, or tied up in Bob's trunk.

The story of the board meeting turned out on the radio as Jamison's attempt to close the pharmacy and stop wasting time and money. He was the protagonist in their story. (Good luck community. You're getting the news from a really "impartial" source there.)

Thanks Bob. That's so informative. I'll keep that in mind. (Jeez)